4 Ways to Feel Better When Your Long Distance Boo LeavesMar 26, 2023
Long distance relationships can be incredibly challenging, particularly when you finally get to spend time with your partner and then have to say goodbye. That post-visit emotional drop can be tough to handle, leaving you feeling down and disconnected from your partner. But don't worry, there are things you can do to mitigate those effects and help yourself feel better.
Use Warmth Like a Bath or Sauna
One way to help ease the post-visit emotional drop is to use warmth like a bath or sauna. Find a cozy spot in your home, curl up with a blanket, and drink a warm cup of tea or cocoa. This can help you feel comforted and relaxed, which can in turn help ease the feelings of sadness and loneliness that can come with the post-visit emotional drop.
Here’s a cool article from Psychology Today about physical and social warmth being co-related!
Plan Time to Feel the Feelings
It's important to give yourself time to feel the feelings that come up after your partner leaves. Set aside some time to cry, journal, or simply be alone with your thoughts. Acknowledge that these feelings are valid and that it's okay to feel them. By giving yourself permission to feel, you can help yourself process and move through those emotions more easily.
Try not to intellectualize. This is my go-to avoidance tactic and guess what? Doesn’t help. Want to know the difference between feeling your feelings and thinking about you feelings? Click here.
Have a Post-Visit Ritual with Your Partner
Another way to mitigate the post-visit emotional drop is to have a post-visit ritual with your partner. This could be something as simple as sending each other a letter or care package, or it could be a more elaborate ritual that you both create together. The important thing is to have something to look forward to after your visits, something that helps you feel connected to your partner even when you're apart.
My long-distance partner and I have a ritual that we eat Krystal burgers on the way home from visiting each other.
Debrief with a Friend or Your Journal
Finally, it can be helpful to debrief with a friend or your journal after your partner leaves. Talk about your feelings, share your experiences, and process what you're going through. Having someone to talk to can help you feel less alone, and writing things down can help you work through your emotions more effectively.
Real talk: writing instead of typing or dictating helps process in a very specific way. Try it out.
The post-visit emotional drop in a long distance relationship can be tough to handle, but there are things you can do to mitigate its effects. Use warmth like a bath or sauna, plan time to feel the feelings, have a post-visit ritual with your partner, and debrief with a friend or your journal. By taking care of yourself and your emotions, you can help make the post-visit emotional drop a little bit easier to bear.
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