Hey friend,
Let’s talk about the version of you that learned to stay quiet to stay safe.
The one who drops hints instead of making requests.
Who crafts a perfectly neutral “Sure, no problem :)” while your stomach churns.
Who gets icy instead of angry—because that was the safer move.
That’s what Week 2 of the Tough Love Challenge is about: passive-aggression as a survival strategy.
It’s not about being manipulative or dramatic.
It’s about protection.
For so many of us, being honest didn’t feel safe growing up. Conflict felt dangerous. Neediness was punished. Emotional expression was met with shame or silence. So we learned to tuck it in, dress it up, send it sideways. Not because we’re weak, but because we’re brilliant survivors.
But here’s the tender truth:
What once protected us might now be keeping us from what we deeply want—connection, honesty, respect, freedom.
This week’s challenge doesn’t ask you to change anything. It just invites you to notice.
No fixing. No shaming. Just curiosity.
What happens in your body when you’re about to say “it’s fine” but it’s not?
What’s the sigh trying to say?
What are you afraid might happen if you speak directly?
Your nervous system still remembers what it used to cost you to be real.
But you’re not stuck there.
You’re allowed to update the strategy.
And this week, all you have to do is watch yourself with love.
You good?
(And I mean really. You good?)
I’m with you in this.
xo,
M
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